Day 18: My [Dream] Wedding

When I was younger, I was convinced that having a big wedding was necessary. It really was my last opportunity to have a day that belonged to just me. (Prom was a nightmare). The first wedding I planned was going to have more than 300 guests! Should I have gone through with it, we would have stayed married for 2 years tops. The second wedding I planned was just as big. It was going to be loud, sparkly, and all Jersey.

Now that I'm older, I want something more like this:

I long for a small, intimate gathering of just our families. I hope that we'll be able to take them all by surprise while on a small yacht. Maybe we'll tell them it's a party. Maybe we'll tell them it's our wedding. Maybe we'll tell them nothing at all.

I'll be wearing a long, flowing, simple white sundress. He'll be in linen pants and long-sleeved shirt. We'll hold hands on the deck repeating our vows after the ship's captain.

There will be no wedding planner, no flowers, no bridal parties, no seating charts, no fancy decor. Just us. Just love, good food, and a microphone with which I will roast my new husband.

image found HERE And yes, if I do get married, I fully intend to use this couple to capture my day. Their photos are spectacular.

"The Ride of Their Lives"

I should be an event planner.

No. I should be a wedding planner.

I remember planning two weddings for myself - many, many, many moons ago - but I don't remember it being this much fun!

Nat has made me her unofficial wedding planner. Which is really cool because I have a good feeling for the things she wants. The best part for me so far is the challenge. When we first discussed her theme she said, "Well, peacocks for me and bikes for Mr. T (formerly Big T)". Peacocks and bikes. Just let them settle in. Because the other thing she told me was that she wanted to "keep it organic and natural too". What. The. Hell.

At first, all I could see were peacocks riding bicycles. And it is hard to shake off your initial reaction. But after I really put my mind to it - and googled "bicycle weddings" - I found these:

Magic, isn't it? Especially since we get to personalize the colors.

Now, I know you should start with your budget in mind but that really is for people who are paying for their own wedding. Since my mom and I are funding Nat's big day, we've decided that she gets whatever we can afford at that moment. At one point, we openly discussed her having an $1100 wedding. Heh. The good news is that we can do better than that. The bad news is that we can't do much better than that.

Here's what we know: there will be rich colors, there will be much thrifting, there will be much DIY, and there will be goo gobs of fabric. Goo gobs. In these wonderful colors. (Eggplant, Indigo, Bronze, Emerald)

    

And even though we haven't put together an official inspiration board, we have come up with a lot of solid ideas that will make it into the wedding. We are definitely going with these cute little guys as favors.

And we're going with short vases. If I can't find colored glass than they will be wrapped in colored paper/fabric. The girls will all wear fabric flowers on their headbands. Mr. T is wearing grey slacks and vest, no jacket with his sleeves rolled up and a hat; his tie will match her shoes. Ashton will be dressed just like his dad. The bride and groom will ride away on their bicycles and we're passing up the" Just Married" sign for individual "Mr. K" and "Mrs. K" signs.

We're having Keds dyed to match her shoes (CBS111 - you save my life everyday). And there will be a banner that says "The Ride of Their Lives". I haven't yet decided where it would best be placed. I'm not even considering the altar. Although, that's totally up to Nat.

So that's it. That's where we are with approximately 200 days to go. 

Weddings Are Joyous and Not Cheap

Nat is getting married. To a man that was absolutely made for her. He is strong, caring, and needs to be needed. She couldn't have found someone better to be matched with... unless this "other guy" ended up being less *pause* *pause* *blink, blink* thrifty.

Awww hell! Big T is just cheap! He's so cheap! He's the kind that will go to the bar with his friends for a beer and then go to the food bank for a loaf of bread. If I have to hear him go on about how broke they are, I might evaluate their income to debt ratio myself just to ease my own mind. This is a man that doesn't drive a car at all.

Which is putting a lot of restraints on Nat's planning. Instead of having it at Mom's like she wanted, they are having to rent a venue downtown because its close to where they and all of his non-car-driving friends live. Venues cost money. She wants to use her iPod for the reception but he has a "friend" in a band. Nat said that having the band for an hour or two and then using the iPod would work for her (she hates song renditions) but now he says that he has a "buddy" who's a DJ and will "do it for cheap". Now, I don't know about you but I did the math and have determined that his friend's band and his DJ buddy will cost more than the iPod that they already own seeing as how it doesn't require a meal or a paycheck.

I know that it's normal for guys to not want to be too involved in the planning process but Big T seems to be dragging Nat to the brink. Last night when she called, I picked up the phone to, "THIS SON OF A BITCH!". It seems that the only thing that Big T really wants to know is "when [her] next day off is so [they] can just be married already". If you're married and you planned your own wedding, you know that this statement is not OK.

After they had the heartfelt discussion about how this was not going to be a shot gun wedding and she is not going to the courthouse so he should shut up about the wedding planning if he wasn't going to be supportive, he offered to have his mom cater. Nat must have been super angry because her reply (at least in her retelling) was, "Hell no! Four mason jars of "spag 09" is more than enough catering from her!" I can't tell you how Big T felt about that because I wasn't there. But I can tell you I laughed for the longest time.

I'm hoping that things work out. Nat has worked hard at picking a theme and colors, now we just need to figure out how to make it all work together. 214 days is enough time to get flowers, food, and invitations, right?

So Glad To Be Back

I used to enjoy Sales Meetings but now they are just something else on the long list of things that I have  to do. I learned a lot. I wrote a lot. I avoided talking to the vendors a lot. And now I have a lot of stuff to do to catch up.

Why does my whole life feel like a waste of time right now?

In other, more exciting new. I got to spend all day Sunday with my nephew. Oh! By the way, Nat is getting married! I wrote an entire Chuck Norris joke post and then forgot to schedule it so you have that to look forward to. We went apple picking last weekend and are going again this weekend. My oven is 200 degrees hotter than advertised. My freezer is leaking into my refrigerator. And the dog and I are both gaining weight.

I am in the midst of another major financial setback and so my car will go without repair again. I don't hate money. I hate the thousands of dollars that I have wasted over the course of my life. This setback is just more waste.

More to the positive... I cut both boys loose. It was just too much stress. I won two sales awards when I wasn't expecting any and I don't have to be a bridesmaid. Look at this face! He's such a ham, but I guess that happens when your father is a photographer and you're the only grandchild.

Ashton, my nephew



That's it. That's all my randomness for now. As soon as I dig myself out of my extensive To-Do Lists, I will be back here posting regularly. Until then, I leave you with this quote from my boss:
" Your scheduled start time for Work is 8am. Clocking in before this time is not allowed unless approved by Your Manager... You need to clock in no earlier than 5 minutes before your scheduled start time."

Yay for Tuesdays!