Thursday, June 10, 2010

Thankful Thursday

I wasn't in the mood to be thankful last week. I'm not really in the mood to be thankful today either. Just know that I'm faking this harder than a GILF. Yeah, I went there... GILF. Think about it. They don't really wanna be there. They're all old and crunchy. Except for Betty White, of course. She's just a little dusty.*

But all-in-all, I'm making this list of things that I'm thankful for.

Wanna read it? Here't goes.

  • time - I know this sounds silly but knowing that I can never get it back makes each moment so precious

  • vacation time - I won't get to spend mine doing anything except sleeping, drooling, writhing in pain and riding in a car for 8 hours each way, but hey! I'm getting paid to do it. Right? Eh...

  • pay checks - God knows I need mine and don't know what I would do without a regular one

  • menstrual cycles - it's a little reminder from Jesus that I'm not pregnant

  • Excedrin PMS - it keeps me from cuttin' a bitch.

  • candles - *deep breaths*

  • nosey neighbors - if I ever really am in trouble, I know that they'll be able to correctly identify the perpetrator.

  • fuckin' Emo, long-hair-dyeing, fake-blood-making, skinny-jean-wearing, off-key-singing, no-talent-having, sommabitches that move back in with your downstairs neighbor - because you are an exercise in patience.

*If you had to click on the link to get the joke then the joke's on you because that is the best skit of this season! If, like me, you clicked on the link because you will use any excuse to relive that moment, well then... you're alright.

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