I wish today felt like a holiday. I want to be happy. But instead I feel this gloom inside threatening to overwhelm every second of my existence. It is not for lack of accomplishments or unrequited love nor for deep-rooted lonliness. No, I mourn for things unseen. The inevitability of future and the consistency of change. My soul cries out for time to stop turning. And in doing so, only wastes the precious morsels. The pain eminates from my belly and radiates to all those around me. The tension and self loathing is palpable. I need it all to end. I beg for it to leave me be. Because as long as it hangs around I feel as though I am a burden to all who know me. Which causes more pain. I would never want to be a burden. But I dont know how to stop.
Goals! But I'm Really Gonna Get All of TheseThings Regardless
Lose 10 pounds - Get a manicure and pedicure Lose 15 pounds - Get new sneakers
Lose 20 pounds - Get new bras Lose 25 pounds - Give baggy, saggy clothes to Goodwill Lose 35 pounds - Get new, sexy, OMG! I'm under 200 pounds outfit (maximum $200) Lose 40 pounds - Get facial Lose 45 pounds - Get new black sandals Lose 50 pounds - Get cable and internet in my apartment Lose 60 pounds - Get silky pajamas (1) Lose 65 pounds - Get sexy lingerie (1) Lose 70 pounds - Professional photo shoot Lose 75 pounds - Celebration party with all my friends
This Is Who I Would Like To Be... We Both Know The Truth
Buy a scale - you don't want to know what happened to my last one - CHECK
Weigh myself weekly
Take my measurements weekly
Drink a glass of V8 everyday
Have breakfast everyday
Join Weight Watchers - (?) or stay at the gym? very undecided
30 minutes of cardio daily
I am not a photographer. Even though I have artistic ability, it has never been fine tuned. If you see something on here that belongs to you, SPEAK UP, and, instead of being a piss ant about it and getting a lawyer, get in touch with me and I'll take it down.
If you don't like what I say, close the browser window and move on with your life.
I reserve the right to mule kick anyone who gives away my personal information, such as but not limited to, my real first and last name, my address, the city I live in, where I work, and how much I really weigh.
If you are a lawyer and you want to make recommendations about other things I should have in this disclaimer then inbox me and we'll talk. But it better be for free.