Ch, Ch, Ch, Changes...

I have decided that I am going to lose weight this year and keep it off. I will. I lost over 30 pounds last year but managed to put 15 back on. Granted, I no longer have 50" hips (and I never want to again). And yes, I am back in to my Buckle jeans (Hall-le-lu-jah!). But I want more. I want a 2-piece bathing suit. You know, I haven't worn one of those in... hold on... carry the one... 13 years. At first, it was because I blossomed like an orchid on steroids and my dad was on the brink of becoming homicidal (lots of attention from older boys; Daddy did not approve). But around senior year in high school, it was because I hated my stomach. Still do actually. My sister, Natalie, has the flattest, tightest stomach I, you, or anyone has ever seen. (Except for maybe Tina Turner's).

The point of all this is that I am going to do things right this time. Last time, I put my success on someone else's shoulders. Was it fair? Hell Yes! You have no idea how much I was paying him. But at the same time, no it wasn't fair for me to take no responsibility for my achievements.

And I'm setting mini goals this time too. Milestones even. With little rewards for myself here and there. Something to keep me going. I'm even going to provide myself with steps to show me the path to my goals. I know it seems basic but I need this. I'm not good when left to my own devices. I need someone to show me the way.

Knowing this, I've decided to join Weight Watchers. The flip side of this coin is that I will be cancelling my gym membership. I know what you're thinking. That not going to the gym is ludicrous and counter-productive. But it's not. I hate the gym. Literally. I hate the smell, the look, the feel, the fact that 70% of the people there are not there to get a workout. Trust me. I know this. I witness it three times a week when I go with my friends.

Plus, I love the outdoors. I used to run while staring out the windows because I really wanted to be outside. So, I'm going to do that. I'm going to go outside and work out in the fresh air (when it becomes less frigid).

And while I'm waiting, I will be in my office working out to one of the many videos and DVDs I have that are collecting dust.

I promise to keep you updated on my progress. Hopefully, we'll succeed together.